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HALL PASS One third of Black girls think boys want them only for sex.† Marcy and Madison are perched on the last bench in the yellow-tiled girls' locker room of their middle school.Their conversation is punctuated by the dull thud of a basketball echoing in the gym next door. I'll stop if you want me to." The friends say sometimes the boys at their middle school—who for the most part live in comfortable homes with professional parents—confront girls with graphic sexual requests and rumors designed to embarrass.
ESSENCE teamed with the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy for a groundbreaking study—and our Jeannine Amber interviewed dozens of kids—to uncover the truth.
"My mother talks about the three-month rule," she says, "about how you aren't supposed to let a boy kiss you for three months." Jasmine throws up her hands in exasperation.
"At my school, we don't even go out with a boy that long." What Jasmine wants from her mother is a real conversation about the nitty-gritty of what to do when a boy gets you alone. It's like they see all these nasty things on TV, and that's how they are learning what to do.
She wants to talk about the way boys are so insistent and impatient and wanting things from her that she gives them and then later regrets. When you are with them, it's like they're ready for war.
They don't even care how you feel." Then Jasmine, who is dressed in a Hello Kitty T-shirt and pink glitter high tops, describes in vivid detail the make-out sessions that resemble tussling matches that go down in the basements, living rooms and bedrooms of her friends' houses when their parents are at work.
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In an age when every bad decision can be digitally immortalized, reputations can be ruined before a child even finishes middle school.